What Does It Mean to Grow Old Gracefully?

I was getting ready for work the other day and this question came to mind. I had always said I wanted to grow old gracefully, but what does that really look like? I am 62 years “young,” as they say. I exercise and like to take care of my body. I also enjoy my quiet time with the Lord each and every day. But often times, I neglect my soul. Soul, meaning my mind, will, and emotions.

I grew up being a people pleaser. I always tried to “keep the peace,” staying out of the way of anyone who was in a bad mood. I never got punished too badly, because I knew when to hide. We were a family of eight, 6 children and 2 parents. My dad owned his own business and always had constant demands put on him. Once in a while, my mom had reached her limit with one of us and would call my dad about it. She would say “once your dad gets home, you’re going to be in trouble.” I knew what that meant, that someone or all of us would get yelled at or spanked. That was when I started hiding under the bed, when I knew things were escalating. So my sense of timing was developed and I managed to stay out of trouble.

I had great parents, but my dad would never allow you to cry in his presence. I guess he was probably raised that way. So I learned how to suck it in and carry on. I always put others wants and desires first. If my husband asked me where I wanted to eat, I would tell him where I thought he would want to eat. People could put a huge guilt trip on me, and one day I asked my husband how to stop the pain. At that time, one of my children had done a particularly painful thing to me. His response was “just don’t care about it.” It was then that I asked “how do I not care?”

So you see I have spent most of my lifetime ignoring what I wanted, or how I wanted things done, and to just suck it in and not talk about it. I remember telling my friend at that time “if I was really me, he (meaning my husband) wouldn’t love me.”

In the last seven years, I’ve started to find my voice. To express myself in a calm and truthful way. I have to say, most of my family didn’t like the new and improved me. My son once said “where is the old mom that would pick up the dog poop when she didn’t even like dogs?”

So in conclusion, I now believe that in order to grow old gracefully, you need to take care of your soul, too. Don’t neglect yourself when giving to others. Take care of the emotional you as you would the spiritual you, and the physical you. Remember, we are three in one.

 

Comment below and let me know what you think.

 

Be blessed, and stay focused on what you are saying with your words and your body.

Bobbi